So, the Internet on campus has not been working for the past
week… I apologize for the lack of update after so many crazy stories about
Rural Home stays. It feels good to be back on campus, and good to be back at
Mirembe House. I’m over half way done with my internship, which blows my mind…
I feel as though I’ve just started. For a while last week, I
felt as though I would leave this place with a sense of guilt that I haven’t
done enough, or that I haven’t used my time wisely-- or that I should have
worked harder at finding creative ways to encourage the girls, or should have
spent more time finding things to teach them--that I should have poured more of
myself into them, or taken more chances, etc… there were a whole bunch of those
thoughts going through my mind. (If you read my first few blog posts, you’ll
recognize this as my fear leaving, moving on, and not learning anything from
the experience.) But, praise God-- He’s teaching me more beautiful things about
how to love the people He loves.
I’ve been able to teach the girls how to make headbands,
make baby books with them (including a photo shoot of them and their pregnant
bellies so that those photos can go inside the baby book), and paint a few
walls in Mirembe House with bible verses. Pictures below!
I’ve been able to practice individual counseling, and learn
a little bit more about how to cook Ugandan style.
The week’s been great.
Also, I’ve been practicing taking initiative since I got
back… it’s one of the areas that my supervisor suggested I grow in during my
midterm evaluation. I was happy she mentioned it, because I’m often someone who
relies so heavily on instruction, and being in the transition between the
educational world and the professional world is a good time to practice taking
initiative and stepping out on a limb when there’s not as much that I can mess
up by making a mistake.
Anyways, while I was thinking about leaving, and trying to
figure out ways to take initiative, and all that kind of stuff, I realized that
I was trying to do this all on my own—that I was trying to focus on my own
strength, and telling myself—I can do this! I’ve got this… etc. Hah. Yeah
right.
Mirembe House began about 10 years ago with Prayer. They continue to pray and
fast throughout their ministry; setting aside one day a month for a whole day
of prayer and worship with the staff, and every Wednesday they spend more than
an hour before lunch doing the same thing. They pray every morning and night
with the girls, and I know they pray beyond those times.
I got a metaphorical smack to the face after my midterm evaluation.. I found a great lesson on dependency when I was reading a homework assignment for the class I’m taking here. In the book, Compassion,
by Henri Nouwen, prayer is explained like this:
“Without fully realizing it, we have accepted the idea that
‘doing things’ is more important than prayer and have come to think of prayer
as something for times when there is nothing urgent to do. While we might agree
verbally, or even intellectually, with someone who stresses the importance of
prayer, we have become children of an impatient world to such an extent that
our behavior often expresses the view that prayer is a waste of time.”
Oofta. Then this.
“Prayer requires that we stand in God’s presence with open
hands, naked and vulnerable, proclaiming to ourselves and to others that
without God we can do nothing…as disciples, we find not some but all of our
strength, hope, courage, and confidence in God. Therefore, prayer must be our
first concern.”
One occurrence that I feel relates to this is in regards newest client at Mirembe House. We’ve gotten four new girls since I last
updated, and the newest one has a heart-wrenching story. I sat in on the
interviewing process, where the social worker there finds out about her
background, and determines if the girl is a good fit for Mirembe House, etc… and let me tell you,
this girl has gone through hell on earth.
I won’t include all the details… it could be a novel of its
own, but essentially this girl was rejected by her family when she was 10,
tried to live on her own for a while, and because of her kindness and
faithfulness to Christ, she has been fired from several jobs (again, the
details will make this too long, but trust me, that part alone had me in
tears). She then stayed with some friends, who encouraged her to prostitute
herself in order to earn money… she refused, but got in a sticky situation with
a job she thought was just house work, leaving that job without knowledge of
what she was going to do next, or how she was going to find money to feed
herself. On the way back from that “job opportunity,” she got raped by three
men on the side of the road, and got pregnant from that.
Her tears just kept coming the whole time she was explaining
this. With literally nowhere to turn, another organization stepped in to simply stand beside her and
love her. But they couldn’t provide housing or money for her, so they brought
her here.
At one point in time, she confessed that she hated the baby
right now. I mean, that sounds harsh, but from everything that happened, it made sense in a strange way. The social worker finished by explaining that although she’s
been through something very difficult, God’s heart is breaking with her. God wants
to stand beside her and bring her healing. And then she explained that Mirembe
House would stand beside her too, doing all they could to help her towards a
better situation.
There are no words to explain the amount of pain in that
room.
I went on with the rest of the day and was able to help the other girls make baby books. I know that some of those girls have had similar experiences as what I just described to you, and so seeing them get excited, thinking about the baby’s first steps, first words, and all those other things reminded me just WHY I can’t do this on my own. The reason why God is the ultimate healer is because He brings hope that no one else can bring. He is the one that continually mends broken hearts, brings joy out of crappy situations, and provides hope to anyone and everyone. The stark difference between the pain that was expressed by this new client and the joy that was evident in the other girls made me just a little bit hopeful, that at some point in time, God might do a similar work in her. He can bring her to love this baby-- because God has a beautiful, wonderful plan for it.
I went on with the rest of the day and was able to help the other girls make baby books. I know that some of those girls have had similar experiences as what I just described to you, and so seeing them get excited, thinking about the baby’s first steps, first words, and all those other things reminded me just WHY I can’t do this on my own. The reason why God is the ultimate healer is because He brings hope that no one else can bring. He is the one that continually mends broken hearts, brings joy out of crappy situations, and provides hope to anyone and everyone. The stark difference between the pain that was expressed by this new client and the joy that was evident in the other girls made me just a little bit hopeful, that at some point in time, God might do a similar work in her. He can bring her to love this baby-- because God has a beautiful, wonderful plan for it.
This is Barbara with her newborn-- Patra Alliyah. :) It's from a few weeks ago, but the baby's doing GREAT, and so is the mom. Praise God. |
More painting. They're quite concentrated on their work. |
Baby books! :) |
In the process of making baby books.. I literally had to pull the paper and stickers out of their hands so that we could save some of the work for later.. |
So, I keep praying, and I remember that even if my time here is short, God’s called me to love outside of myself, because that’s all I can do at Mirembe House. What an honor.
Beautiful reflection, Mary! Thanks for sharing your experience with all of us. Praying that the remainder of your internship is a blessing to you and to those whom you serve.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Prof Foreman
Mary! Thanks for taking the time to write blog posts! I look forward to reading them and I am inspired by your heart and what God is doing in Uganda! What you said about prayer is convicting and inspiring and makes a lot of sense! I can't wait to see you again! God bless!
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, I love reading about your experiences Mary! I am very excited for you and will keep you in my prayers. You are such a gifted and kind person; blessings to you!
ReplyDelete